Mom: Something wrong with that kid.
Dad: You had her.
Mom: No, I’m pretty sure you did and I didn’t have anything to do with it.

Mom: “How do you spell Thirteen?”
Dad: “One – Three.”
Mom: “No… I’m writing a check.”
Dad: “Oh, One – Three – Dot – Zero – Zero.”

Mom: “I think she wants a thirty-seven inch television instead of a thirty-two.”

Dad: “Everyone always wants an extra five inches.”

Dad: close your eyes Steph! Boobs are about to be shown!
Mom: if you haven’t realized by now, she has some. i couldn’t see how you CAN’T see them. they are HUGE!!

-we were watching the Godfather

My Father: “Will you stop swearing like a street ho?”

- Talking to my mother.

Mom: I need to do the dallas cheerleaders workout.
Dad: I need to do the dallas cheerleaders………..(Mom glares at him) workout as well.