Brother: If I was gay would you still love me?
Mom: I’ve never loved you.

Mom: "Do you think that rooster was gay? I think there was something in the way he walked."

(upon bringing a friend over for the first time)
Mom: "Oh, are you finally bringing home your boyfriend and coming out of the closet?"
Me: "Mom, I’m not gay and he’s just a friend."
Dad: "No one believes you."

Mom: "You have to try these crackers; they’ll change your life."
(Dad eats cracker)
Dad: "You’re right. I’m gay now."
Mom: "They make me happy too!"

Mom: "I’d rather you be gay than be pregnant."

80 year old grandpa on racism: "Everybody’s a little racist; and everyone’s a little gay too."

Submitted by:

cyndig

(as I watch The Real World)
Grandfather: "Are you watching a gay party?!!"

Mom (First time meeting my gay friend): "So, what exactly is an anal wand for, and is it fun?"

Submitted by: and he’s still my friend!

Me: Oh, I’m going with my boyfriend tomorrow.
Grandma: I thought he was gay

Submitted by: crazy grandmother says…

Me: Do you love me Mom?
Mom: Of course.
Me: Would you love me if I was gay?
Mom: Yes, of course. You’re my daughter, I will always love you.
Me: What if I was bi-sexual?
Mom: No, because then you’re a slut. You have to pick one or the other.

Submitted by: Jacqueline